“Today is yours,” we tell people on their birthday. “Enjoy it.”
But sadly, nobody, not even Einstein, has owned that much time. If any. And in case we forget, the universe likes to remind us of that.
Bought 60 doughnuts for the office to celebrate? Too bad, you’ll need to self-isolate and work from home. Baked yourself a cake? Oops, the floor ate it all.
So what do we do when we get the short end of the stick? The only thing there’s left. Laugh. Here’s an exclusive We list of the most unfortunate birthdays. Enjoy!
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#1 I Was The Only One Who Turned Up To My B-Day Party. So I Got Some Balloon Friends To Join
RELATED: #2 The Worst Birthday Card I’ve Ever Gotten
Birthday rituals are historical and universal events, which have been around since the prehistoric era. But in ancient history, only the privileged had birthdays; the “parties” were solely reserved for kings and nobility members.
Familiar birthday customs and symbols are currently seen among most cultures, however, some people have adopted unique traditions, characterized by their values and way of life.
For example, in ancient Japan, children often died young, so nowadays, in addition to their actual parties, they participate in the 7-5-3 celebration (Shichi-go-san), held on November 15. The name refers to the ages of the children celebrated: any child who reaches age three, boys who reach age five, and girls who reach age seven. They put on fine clothing and visit a religious shrine in thankfulness for their health.
#3 My Kid During His Birthday Safari
#4 Happy Birthday!
#5 Thank You, Facebook
Another interesting tradition is in Nepal, where it’s considered good luck for the birthday girl or boy to have brightly colored rice yogurt smeared on their forehead. There may be cake, there may be gifts, but colorful, delicious, and sticky yogurt? Almost always.
Interestingly, ancient Greeks also celebrated their gods’ birthdays. And we’re having their “leftovers” even today. The Greeks had a tradition where they would bake a special cake made of wheat, honey, olive oil, and cheese. It was sometimes made into a lunar shape to honor the goddess Artemis. In honor of her beauty, candles were put on the cake to make it glow.
#6 It Was Supposed To Say Happy Birthday Lizard (Her Nickname)
#7 Today’s My Birthday. No One Could Make It Over For Pizza And Games, The Power Went Out And I Twisted My Ankle Because I Couldn’t See Coming Down The Stairs
It’ll be me, the guitar, and some tears tonight. Happy 20th to me!
#8 Everyone Including My Parents Forgot It Was My Birthday Today, So I Improvised
#9 My Friend’s 16th Birthday Was On 9/11
Over time, the birthday cake spread throughout the world. It is often thought that China was the first to bake a cake for a child’s first birthday, but it’s probably the Germans who actually modernized this tradition in the 18th century and made it what we know today.
German cakes typically included candles, one for each year the person had lived plus one more for good luck that they would survive the next. The Germans were also the first to start making a wish when blowing out the candles.
#10 My Quarantine Birthday Is Going Well
#11 Me And All The Friends I Invited To My Birthday
#12 Bought 60 Doughnuts For The Office Today To Celebrate My 20th Birthday, Only To Be Told I Need To Self Isolate/Work From Home For The Next Week
#13 Someone Threw Away The Rest Of My Birthday Cake Before I Was Able To Take It Home
#14 Did This At Football Practice. On My Birthday
#15 Someone Cut The Cake That Was For Me Today At Work Without Telling Anyone In The Break Room
#16 It’s My Birthday. It’s Also The Only Day My Doctor Could Remove My 3 Kidney Stones (Laser Lithotripsy)
#17 Mom Made Me A Birthday Cake Last Year. Didn’t Leave Enough Room To Dot The Exclamation Point
#18 Someone Stole My Professor’s Birthday Cupcakes That He Left In His Room For Today
#19 Whole Foods Prime Delivery For My Mom’s Birthday
#20 How My Friend Is Celebrating His Birthday Today
#21 When You Get A Cake For Your Birthday And You’re Older Brother Eats It Before You Celebrate Your Birthday
#22 Absolutly No One Remembered My Birthday Except Another Person Who Has The Same Birthday As Me And Gave Me A Pen
#23 It’s My Birthday. I’m In The Hospital And They Don’t Know What’s Wrong
#24 Well, That’s Annoying
#25 Turned 26 Today, Contact Fell Out While Walking Into Work, Tried To Rub My Eye To Help The Irritation While Looking Down, And Walked Into A Brick Wall. Happy Birthday To Me
#26 Had To Have Emergency Surgery To Get My Appendix Removed This Morning. Oh And It’s My Birthday
#27 My Mom Made Me A Pan Of Brownies For My Birthday, And My Son Insisted On To Carrying Them On The Way Home
Got back and somehow they ended up with a giant footprint in them.
#28 Happy Birthday, Hope You Didn’t Want A Cake
#29 Decided To Work On My Birthday Today, Was Going To Leave Early But Instead 3 People Called Out So Here I Am 12 And A Half Hours In And Still Going. Happy Birthday To Me
#30 My Mom Ordered A TV (Delivered By FedEx) For Me For My Birthday. We Just Opened It Up To Turn It On And…
#31 The USPS Cares. About Stealing Your Birthday Money Sent From Your Poor Grandmother
#32 This Was My Dad’s Boat On Our 2nd Time Out After Buying It. It Was Also On My Birthday
#33 Homeless On My Birthday And Out Of Gas. Such Is Life I Guess
#34 Birthday Gift From My Family To My Introverted Self So I’ll Have “Someone To Talk To”
#35 My Mom Wanted To Surprise Me With A Delivery Of My Favorite Pizza & Ice Cream From Ohio To LA For My Birthday. UPS Lost The Package For 2 Days And Delivered On The 3rd – Refused Refund
She packed it in a cooler on ice & shipped via UPS for $350+ so it could be delivered the next day during my birthday party.
#36 I Tested Positive For Covid-19 On My Birthday
#37 One Of My Dogs Decided The Best Way To Start My Birthday Was To Get Sprayed By A Skunk Right Before We Went To Bed And Now Our Whole House Smells Like Skunk
#38 My Little Brother Had His Appendix Removed On His 11th Birthday
#39 Today Is My Birthday And This Is What Should Have Become My Cake
#40 At My 30th Birthday, One Of My Friends Dropped His Phone On The Cake. One Of My Best Memory And One Of His Worst
#41 Yesterday, On My Birthday, Some Lady Decided To Cut Across Traffic And Hit Me Head On
#42 My Parents Gave Me This As A Birthday Present Today. For When I Leave Home And Want To Travel
#43 Today Is My Birthday, And All I Can Do Due To Restrictions Is Buy A Whole Box Of Donuts For Myself
#44 Kid Spitting All Over The Cake
#45 I Ate It Anyway. 4 Hours Of Baking, Half An Hour Before My Bday BBQ, Dropped On The Ground. And Every Piece Was Savored
#46 Social Distancing During My Birthday
#47 My Husband Baked Me A Cake For My Birthday And Put It In The Oven So Our Dogs Couldn’t Get It. I Was Not Aware And Turned On The Oven
#48 Bought Myself A Birthday Cake Yesterday. Then The Rest Of My Family Found It
#49 My Friends And I Went Out To Celebrate One Of My Friend’s Birthday, Only To Come Back To Have My Friend’s $7000 Camera Stolen On His B-Day
#50 My Mom Sent Me A Birthday Care Package From Cross Country With My Favorite Candy. This Is What LA Heat Did To My Precious Milk Duds
